Raising an only child comes with its own challenges and blessings. Without brothers or sisters to share the ups and downs, an only child may grow up to be more independent and mature faster since they engage in adult conversations with their parents. On the other hand, parents don’t have to split their time, financial resources, and energy when raising an only child. The Challenges of Only Child Parenting 1. ACHIEVEMENT PRESSURE As a private tutor for nearly 30 years, I have seen many of my students who are only children feel pressured to be everything for their parents. Whether it’s being on their best behavior, achieving academic success, or striving for perfection, the pressure to excel can be overwhelming. Witnessing a parent’s disappointment over grades or feeling they have not lived up to expectations can damage their confidence. 2. LONELINESS I rarely felt lonely as an only child. My imagination kept me company from a young age, so loneliness never became a problem. But some of my students crave a sibling, so their parents feel pressured to arrange playdates or be their only child’s playmate, especially during school breaks. Only children often need to build close friendships to build their own chosen family. 3. CONCENTRATED RESPONSIBILITIES Parents often rely on siblings to teach each other negotiation skills, patience, and compromise. There’s an added responsibility on parents to help their child learn social skills by participating in group activities. My mother chose to wait until I was a teenager before working outside the home so she could spend more time with me. May/June 2026 Hawaii Parent 147
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