122 Hawaii Parent May/June 2026 friends. When children have healthy sources of belonging and success, bullying is less likely to define their entire sense of self. Cyberbullying Parents should take cyberbullying seriously as well. For older kids, teach them not to respond to cruel or threatening messages. Save screenshots, texts, posts, or usernames so there is documentation. Set clear limits around technology and social media use. Keep communication open about what your child is seeing online, and monitor in a way that fits their age and developmental level. Children are more likely to tell you what is happening online if they believe you will help them rather than simply take everything away. Work with the School Working with the school is often necessary. Report the bullying clearly and factually. Share what happened, when it happened, who was involved, and how it has affected your child. Ask what steps will be taken and how your child’s safety will be supported. Follow up if the problem continues. Bullying often happens in places with less supervision, such as hallways, cafeterias, buses, bathrooms, and playgrounds, so adult monitoring in those settings matters. It is also worth remembering that some children who bully others need help too. If your child is showing bullying behavior, respond firmly and directly. Make it clear that hurting others is not acceptable. At the same time, try to understand what may be driving the behavior. Some children bully because of poor emotional regulation, insecurity, social pressure, low empathy, or stress in other parts of life. Clear limits and, when needed, mental health support can help stop the pattern early. About the author: Dr. Elsa Lee is a neuropsychologist and clinical director at Assets School. She oversees the Transforming Lives Center, which provides psychoeducational and neuropsychological evaluations for school-aged children in Hawaii.
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