Worrying, it’s something all parents do. I am guilty of it, especially when I lie awake at three AM, with the silence of the house ringing in my ears. I worry about what I forgot to do, what I need to do, what I should have done, and what I already did. Parenthood is hard. There is always something to be done, someone who needs assistance, and multiple things to worry about. The list is endless but may include everything from feeding your kids healthy foods, to your child’s friendships, to what others think about your choices. Some worries are valid, but many are not worth the time and effort. What if we could learn to let them go? PERSONAL EXPECTATIONS Before I became a parent, I had high expectations for myself as a mother. I had things I wanted to do and things I declared I would never do. After my first child was born, I quickly realized that I would change my perspective on most pre-child declarations. “Let go of the idea that you will be the perfect parent because it won’t happen,” says twin mother Aly Ridgeley. When parents accept that they are doing the best they can, they will be able to cross this worry off their list. by Sarah Lyons GUILT Do you worry that you don’t spend enough time with your child? Do you feel guilty you were not able to breastfeed your child or that you missed a soccer game? Do you feel bad you forgot to remind your son to grab his lunch on the way out the door? The guilt of these things can weigh heavily on a parent but you have permission to let it go. It is okay if you miss a game or a school party. We all have to make choices and sometimes those choices cause unnecessary guilt. Once a decision is made, move forward and let go of the feelings of guilt. They will only rob you of enjoying the present. 130 HAWAII PARENT July/August 2025
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